Merry Christmas, Everyone

Best. Christmas. Ever.

And it’s not over yet….!

Final, Official, and Forever

Yesterday, Malcolm’s adoption was finalized. Final. Forever. Can never be undone. Amazing. God has blessed us; He is so good.

It’s important to realize the significance of yesterday. It is the final declaration by the State that we are Malcolm’s parents. It’s no different than if he were born to us. It seals the adoption records, along with Malcolm’s original birth certificate. Our state requires a minimum of a six-month waiting period after the agency has placed the child in your home before finalization. Malcolm’s birth parents had terminated their rights many months ago, in accordance with state law. There was never a risk of that changing. We were basically letting the clock run out.

We arrived at the juvenile courthouse, all dressed in our Sunday best. After passing through the metal detector, and being greeted by the security guards, we checked in and took a seat near the judge’s chambers. Everyone was so nice to us. We were told several times that they see some sad situations as employees of the juvenile court, so adoptions are their favorite.

Another couple from our agency arrived a few moments after us. They had a precious blue eyed blonde haired little girl, born just 3 weeks after Malcolm. We all chatted, realized that we knew some of the same people, and excitedly shared our adoption stories with each other.

When the lawyer and agency reps arrived, the three of us, Mike, Malcolm, and I, were escorted into the judge’s chambers. She spoke a little about what she had read in the social worker’s report. We talked about Malcolm’s teeth, and his eating habits. It all felt very informal. She then told us that this was forever, and an adoption cannot be undone. No matter what. She asked if we understood, and were ready and willing to make the commitment. Of course, we both said yes! And that was it! She talked about her own daughter for a bit, and shared a few stories. The lawyer gave us several copies of the adoption decree, and that’s a wrap!! We stepped out to the courtroom for a few photos, a few more stories, and we were outta there!

We took a few more photos out in the parking lot… Malcolm wasn’t really in the mood…

Then we celebrated with a family lunch. It was all a little surreal, but very awesome. Later, we picked up a cake (Malcolm had his very first buggy ride, which he LOVED!)…

And we celebrated at home that night with our family. We bought the biggest box of candles they had at the store and lit every last one of them. Twenty-four in all. No significance, no symbolism. Just wanted to light as many candles as would fit on the cake! And we popped bottles too! Everyone drank from a champagne glass no matter what they were sipping.

We toasted to Malcolm and celebrated the end of a wonderful day.

Also, that morning, Mike gave me this beautiful cross necklace to wear to court. I don’t know how he knew that it was JUST WHAT I WANTED. How on earth did he know? Couldn’t have been all those “hints” I ever-so-casually dropped the past two weeks 😉

It was truly a wonderful day. As I relive the events in my mind, there is one song that continues to play as the soundtrack for the day. How He Loves. It’s a reminder to me that without God, none of this would be possible. He was there for every step, from way back when, 11 years ago, through every day of our beautiful marriage, and every step of the waiting process, gently guiding us and leading us to where we are today. While it didn’t always make sense, I had to trust that he always had a plan for us. And oh how He loves us!

December 17, 2000

On Monday, I got the most wonderful surprise:

And I had completely forgotten it was our anniversary! Shame on me. I was so focused on Tuesday (more on that in a minute), that I had not remembered the importance of Monday. Twelve years ago, Mike officially asked me to be his girlfriend. Yes, it was as sweet and cheesy a conversation as what you are imagining in your head. We were in high school. Me a junior, he a senior. A couple of weekends before, we had gone to Sadie Hawkins together, and we just hit it off from there. I really do remember thinking, as we were riding around in Mike’s el camino after Sadie, just talking about nothing, “geez, I really could marry this guy.” And I tried to push the thought away because I was only 16 years old, for crying out loud! Far too young to think like that. But as crazy as it sounds, I always knew.

And after twelve years together, he still has a few tricks up his sleeve. Only one other time do I remember him giving me flowers. He showed up at my mom’s house one valentines night, wearing his weekend uniform of a white tee and maroon EDW p.e. shorts (don’t hate – those shorts were comfy as hell!) with the last two tiny dying and decrepit roses left in the flower shop. I think I actually laughed out loud. Probably why I never got flowers again. Until Monday. Pretty sure I actually LOL-ed at these flowers too, but mostly out of disbelief. Even seeing my name on the card, I knew those flowers weren’t for me. But I was wrong. You done good, Mike! I love you!!

Side note: I also just realized that Monday also marked six years since we got engaged. We were engaged on our six-year dating anniversary and that was six years ago. Cool

And as for Tuesday… Malcolm’s adoption was finalized!! It is officially official! I’d say its been a good week.

Baby’s First Motocross

We took Malcolm to the motocross track for the first time today to watch the races. Look at that proud daddy showing his son the ropes. “that’s a tabletop jump. And that’s the rhythm section. And this is a sprocket.”

We came, we saw, we left as fast as we could. Truth is, the moment we stepped out of the car, I realized how loud it is. Duh. How did I not remember this before we left the house? I knew it would be loud, but each time one of the bikes roared past, I felt more nervous. I could see the little follicles inside Malcolm’s ear dying off, one by one, and his full hearing never to be restored. I’m thinking, “I have hearing problems. So does Mike’s dad. And my pawpaw Allen has had hearing aids for years! Deafness and hearing loss runs in our families! We have to get out of here before we ruin this poor boy.” Then, I remember that Malcolm doesn’t share our genetics so I feel a little calmer. And then instantly panicked again. What if his birth family has deafness issues we don’t even know about?

So after a few minutes of walking around, trying to find a spot that wasn’t so loud, I fed Malcolm in the car, and we left. Mike said the track was too sloppy to have really good races anyway. The interesting part is that Malcolm really seemed to like it. Or was at least intrigued by it. I’ve never seen him so calm and focused on something before.

Now we need noise-canceling earmuffs. Like the ones Drew Brees’ son wore for the Super Bowl. They’re not expensive and will calm my nerves enough to let us all enjoy this sport together. So I guess, all panic aside, that was the cool part about today – experiencing something Mike loves (motocross) as a family. We’ve always talked about getting our kids involved in the sport, either as a rider or spectator, and today, it was cool to see a glimpse of that.

Sweater Leggings

Yep, sweater leggings. What are they? Only the best thing ever. Get you some! Exhibit A:

Beyond comfortable. Beyond amazing. Beyond your wildest expectations. These pants are a dream come true. Now, I don’t want to talk them up too much, but I don’t think that’s possible. And with all the holiday deals and discount codes right now, I’m gonna have to get a second pair (they also come in charcoal / black).

Some questions you may have:
Can I wear these in public?
A: I say yes, but Mike said no way (as I was heading out the door to work. Hey, it was Saturday! All about the casual)

Q: what do they feel like?
A: heaven.

Q: what do I wear them with?
A: dress them up or down. An oversized shirt, gold sandals, and some big earrings and wavy hair – cute and comfy. I see myself dressed like this at the grocery store. Mike sees me dressed like this in the insane asylum. Or dress em down, like me:

Furry blue moccasins are a must!

Final q: And where can I get them? A: the gap.

And there you have it. This is how I will be spending my cold winter evenings from now on. Just me and my sweater leggings. And my blue suede moccasins.

Sights of Christmas

What’s better than dogs in pajamas? Dogs in Christmas pajamas with butt flaps that don’t cover their butts, and velvet jingle-bell collars. If looks could kill, I’d be a dead woman.

Malcolm’s first visit with Santa. Hey there Big Guy. He was so curious. No fear… This year.

Love

Time, please slow down!! Malcolm is growing up too quickly. But in the same breath, I am one proud mama. It seems as soon as I’ve caught up and documented all of Malcolm’s “firsts,” he’s on to the next one. I can hardly keep up!

Yesterday, we went to eat wings after church with some friends, as is the Sunday routine. But instead of giving Malcolm a bottle or baby food, he chewed on a crisp cold carrot stick. Since he’s teething, I know it must have felt good on his gums, and he seemed to really like the taste.

This was his first taste of table food, as far as I know. Besides the ice cream that not one, but two separate relatives, on two separate occasions, snuck to him when I wasn’t looking.

It was a sweet ending to a hellacious weekend of fevers, teething, coughs, colds, and general fussiness. And after all that, I can’t help but love the little guy more and more every day. It was an emotional weekend. I would look at his pitiful, swollen, puffy, tear-soaked face with feelings of complete and hopeless love. He needs me to make it all better. And in these moments, I am beginning to realize how much my heart needs him. I could cry just looking at him. Give me five more minutes, though, of the incessant crying, hair pulling (ouch!), runny nose mess, and I’m begging for a reprieve. And I could cry from frustration. It’s crazy. I’m crazy. Crazy in love. (Somebody cue the Beyonce – Uh oh, uh oh, uh oh, oh no-no).

And then, after such a sleepless and tiring weekend, we emerged on the other side. It’s Monday. Things are looking up. I love this kid more than I knew, and I proved it to myself by being a Mom. His caregiver when he truly needed a little extra love and affection. As much as I’ve tried to avoid that title and all stereotypes that come with it, I’m learning that being called “Mom” is not all that bad. And I received the most wonderful reward. My heart grows just thinking about it. After several weeks of trying to teach Malcolm baby sign language, he did it!! He signed “more!”

Each night when I feed him, I make the sign for “more,” while asking if he wants more. Sometimes, I’ll push his hands together to show him how the motion should feel. But tonight, when I asked if he wanted more – he answered me! My 6-1/2 month old baby boy answered me and told me that he did, in fact, want more. Was this a fluke? Can he do it again? Oh can he! He repeated it several times and even showed off for dad when he got home. I was so excited, I fed him an extra bowl of food so I could see him do it again and again.

Truly my proudest moment as a parent so far. We taught him something positive. We influenced him. He’s learning positive ways to communicate. He is so smart. He does things in his own time – you can’t force him. To anyone else, this may seem like a nice but insignificant story. But to me, it’s like – I get it. This is what it’s all about. Moments like this (cue the Kelly Clarkson). And he’s only six and one half months old. Keep this up, and my kid’s gonna be president of the united states… win the nobel prize… Create the next dance craze… Sell more records than lil Wayne… Cure cancer… Bring about world peace. Did I mention I was proud? 😉